Onslaught

This past weekend was the FUSED Onslaught Spring Retreat...it felt so different from past retreats. I got to produce with Penny & lead my senior girls in small group. That was a big gift to get to be with them again.

Retreat was a lot of fun & 12 kids came home new! Joanna & I got to lead a girl named Rachel, who we have been talking to for weeks...It was so gorgeous getting to watch her courageously give Jesus her heart & choose to trust Him. She was beaming when she finished praying...absolutely stunning.

On the way to retreat, I got a phone call asking me to pray about stepping into leading a lifegroup. I am still pretty stunned by the fact that I got an ask like that. I got to ask Jesus about it on retreat...didn't hear super clear yes or no, but my feeling is that I'm not quite ready for it just yet. I still have a lot of learning to do before saying yes to a huge entrustment like that. It's crazy that Jesus & people see me as someone with that potential though...

Anyway, it's officially SPRING! I'm ready to get out & take pictures. If only this weather would warm up!

March showers...

Spring is almost here...and summer is approaching too!

Britton finally popped the question this weekend & he & Liz are engaged! I am SO excited for these two friends I love so much! They have been so faithful & trusting of Jesus and His plans, and I have been praying that their engagement & wedding are just a lavish picture of His love for them. I was blown away last night when Liz told me she would love to have me stand by her side as she marries Britton in just a few short months...blown away. I love that girl and I am so happy for her! Now I get to help her get ready for her big day! AH!

As for my own, I still have absolutely no clue when it would be...whether it's going to be this year or next. I just looked over my vacation days & it looks like I will have to miss some really fun stuff this year :( I might have to miss the high school road trip again, and I'm pretty sure I have to miss Women's Retreat. I just don't have enough vacation days & I can't take any unpaid vacation days, which stinks. Especially if D is thinking of us getting married this year, that would mean a postponed honeymoon. Oh well, I guess I don't need to be worrying about it until the time comes...

Speaking of D-Jesus has been SO faithful & has just been giving gifts all over the place. Last week he kind of threw a Jeep right in D's lap, and he now is driving a car he wanted & he didn't have to pay a dime. Crazy. Then, D got a job offer from a guy we serve with in Fused, followed by 3 openings at Lexmark that he got to apply for. I pray Jesus shows him just where to go & opens the door for him to jump. It feels like he's getting a call-up into adulthood or something...like, realizing it's time to step out of the 'student' position & into the real world with responsibility.

I got to teach LG for the first time (w/Merda there) last night...it made me want to vomit a little. I don't know if I would like leading a LG...it's hard!

And last, I am DYING to get out & shoot some pictures! I spent some time reading up on digital photography to really know how to use my camera...not just play until I get a good picture. I want to be knowlegeable of what I'm doing & grow my skills. I think I have an eye for it, but I need to know the technicals too. I would still love to be a professional photographer...maybe one day.

WTH

What the heck?

So I'm hearing Jesus' voice more clearly than ever...I get to be an apprentice in Accelerate this year, and Matt Garner is my Accelerator! Crazy & strange, but it will be great. I got to meet with him Saturday & lay down some offenses & let him know that I choose to follow him & trust him. I can't wait to see what this year holds & what I look like by the end of it...

Tonight in Fused we are splitting again, middle school from high school. I get to step into the role of the producer, which means I am no longer the senior girls' small group leader. It makes me sad to leave them but Jesus lavished me this weekend...I got to see my investment in that group overflow as I watched Ashlea McIllwain, Courtney Harris & Amy Thornberry all give their lives to Jesus! What in the world!?! What a way to step out & into a new spot.

I'm so freaking excited to see what the Lord has in store for FUSED...I think the ministry will just explode once we get going with the split. We'll have more room for students & I think the kids will love being around people their age instead of being mixed.

Here we go!

Accelerate

Accelerate.
That pretty much describes what Jesus is doing right now.
(I still can't believe we're only a month and a half into 2010)

Fused has grown so much over the last year...we've pretty much doubled in size since we went 'fused' last February, & Jesus is now switching things up again...starting in 1 week, we will be split HS & MS to make room for more kids. I'm getting to step into the permanent producer role, which means not leading a small group anymore. I'll miss my senior girls, but I heard from Jesus this is where He wants me, so I'm going to follow Him there. I can't wait to see what He has next for fused.

Accelerate 2010 starts tonight...& I was accepted to participate this year. It makes me excited & nervous at the same time. I feel like Jesus told me I will be an apprentice this year. Crazy, & I know it's not because I deserve it...but because He wants to root out all self in me so He can remold me into who He dreamed me to be.

This week...

I need to be refueled.

It's been a challenging few days. But, thank Jesus, I'm looking forward to the Thrive class tonight & some free time afterwards, as well as a free Friday, followed by Cincinnati w/D. all day Saturday & a wedding at an aquarium Sat. night. (how cool is that?)

So, tonight/tomorrow, I plan to do some or all of the following to refuel my heart:
-Spend time at a coffee shop sipping on delicious drinks & spending time w/Jesus
-Go to the gym
-Play outside
-Take pictures
-Paint
-Clean my car out

Wowzers

I couldn't think of a better title.

Jesus is a-mazing. It's just over 2 weeks into the year & I can't believe what He has done already.

After I wrote my last post, I went to Fused that night & got to lead my 12th grade girls in small group, where we all got to encourage a new girl, Courtney in her search for God...then I got to freaking lead her to Christ! What in the world! She is a new girl...pure & innocent because of Jesus.

After we cheered & celebrated, I then learned that D. was leading a boy to Christ at the same time! His first person ever! I can't wait to see how that shifts something in him...it's like he's been right at the edge of something big for a while & now it's time for take-off.

A few days later, Mer asked me to pray about being her (official) Lifegroup apprentice! After praying about it, I heard a yes from Jesus. I now get to step into deeper water & learn what it means to lead... Crazy.

And now, it's almost my birthday! Last night we had my b-day dinner at Dad's...it's always fun getting to hang out with family & watching D. interact with them. I got a desk calendar with gorgeous pictures of places around the world, & reed diffuser that smells delicious, but is currently overpowering my office!

My best friend surprised me this afternoon with beautiful flowers & a gift certificate to get a 1 hour hot stone massage! AH! SO great. And I just finished a caramel machiatto my boss bought me.

Thanks God for lavishing me today...even before my b-day.

Now I have 1 hour before I leave for a 3-day weekend where I'll get to celebrate Shannah, myself, produce at church, hang out with my best friend & listen to great music, have a blast at lifegroup & possibly go hiking at the Gorge! YAY!

So...Wowzers. It encompasses the state of my heart over the last month.

2010

It's 2010.

2009 was an amazing year...Jesus did SO much in me & around me, it's hard to even imagine what He might do this year. I don't even know what all to ask for...

Last week was winter break & I got to spend a lot of time with my family & D's family. It was so great. Going into the break, I was asking Jesus to help me just be myself; to love our families with His heart & just be me without worry 0r pretending or people-pleasing. And, as the Lord is faithful, I felt more like myself last week than I ever have around our families.

I got to play board games with my dad & Fran, hang out with Tommy & Jessi, play & joke with D's cousins & even tell my story to his family from Iowa. It was incredible...an amazing start to the new year. If that's what the beginning of 2010 looks like, what in the world could it look like by the end of the year? There is so much hope for restoration & redemption.

Fused is kicking off tonight with a look back at what Jesus did in 2009 & looking forward to this year. I don't have a clue what to expect in Fused this year...we have pretty much doubled since this time last year...and I only see us growing. Not just in numbers, but I see the kids growing closer to God. I love it!

Well, I'm going to close out with a few things I'm asking for for 2010:

• Lead 5 people to Jesus
• Fran to come on Women's retreat
• to be confident & unapologetic in the way I lead people
• to read 'the Shack'
• for a different heart towards my old friends...one that is joyful & hopeful instead of scared & hidden
• Taylor to come on Fused retreat in March