A light in the Darkness

I've been learning a lot this season. A lot about leadership & what it means to just be myself. This weekend was a big smack in the face, but at the same time, Jesus was so faithful and steady.

Truth is, there is so much darkness around us, and in us. But when we bring that darkness out into the light, it loses whatever power it once held. I'm learning what it means to get everything into the light...not just the seemingly big things. To be known and recognize those things about myself & my heart that I have just tended to overlook or try to overcome....Jesus wants us to get those things out. Not so that he can fix us, but so that he can love & lead us through them to freedom.

I pray that when you find yourself in the middle of the darkness, that you'll be exposed. It may hurt & be scary at first, but it's really such a gift to be in the spot where you get to choose now what to do...choose Jesus. Whatever that means. Just choose Him. He is always the best choice.

He exposed to me yesterday places where my heart had started to harden on the subject of engagement...I was turning bitter & hopeless, believing the lie that God has been withholding something great from me. I really do desire to be married, to Dusty. I want him to propose. But I don't want it to be rushed-I really do want it to happen in God's timing. Jesus really does know how to lavish me, and I know that's His plan...so let's see, be lavished, or just get it over with? Hmmm...I choose Jesus.

I can't believe it's already December...it's unreal to me how much I've grown over this past year & I really can't wait for what God has next for me in 2010, and for my family...it feels like He's on the brink of something huge. I can't wait!